Friday, April 5, 2013

Out of the Fog

Now that Ramsey is allowed to come and go out of the barn and doesn't require quite so much intensive care, I've started to finally look around myself and think about all of the things that have been shoved aside or left undone this winter.  The list is long.  Thinking about everything, reassessing, it feels like I am slowly coming out of a very dense fog.

Maybe it has been the relentless wind, the extreme dreariness of the weather combined with the stress and worry for Ramsey, but I am having trouble finding the motivation to even begin.  I look at my still untrimmed windows and think, so they didn't get done this winter like I intended, so what?  I try to think about the garden and the idea of starting seeds seems daunting, especially since the garden beds are still frozen solid.  I look at the brush around my pond that I would like to clear and it's, the stuff has been there umpteen years, what's one more.  It's a very slippery slope people.

I think I just need some sunny days.  I have been joking all winter about the whole population becoming vitamin D deficient and then I had a blood test a couple of weeks ago and what do ya know?  I really am deficient.  I really do need some sunny days.

The weatherman keeps promising that we have a couple of them coming up.  If the weather does get nice, I have this whole long list of things to do, but I may just pull a chair out into the donkey yard instead and do some sun bathing with Emma and Ramsey.  A radical thought for a red-head, but maybe it will help clear the fog.


9 comments:

  1. Just remember the sun screen and bask in the rays. Don't worry, you'll get going - probably with one little task that will snowball into many.

    Wish I could come and sit with you and your herd in the spring sunshine!
    I wonder if people keep donkeys in Alaska? brrrr

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    1. There are probably people who keep donkeys in Alaska, there must be right? I just hope that I am never, ever one of them!:)

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  2. I think the lack of sun really does make a difference. Since I moved to WY, by the end of winter I am feeling pretty crappy physically most of the time. It takes most of summer to get over it, but eventually I do. It is almost like flu like symptoms for me that hit me every afternoon. If I go out side and sit in the sun for a while, I start feeling better. I used to think it was all in my head, but now I know that it isn't
    I can relate to your long list and it sounds like you are a little overwhelmed. Who wouldn't be? Not only are you doing these things on your own, but you just spent a good amount of time and energy rehabbing the cutest little donkey in the world. Give your self a break dear. Its ok to just want to relax a little. I have a feeling that pretty soon you will start feeling rejuvenated and ready to tackle the world again!
    :-)

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  3. I found liquid Vit D does help me out a lot in the winter but don't look at the big tasks....make the list into little things and pick one of the LITTLE ones to do each week, you'll be surprised how undaunting it can become and how motivating it will be.

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  4. Hang in there, Kris and I agree with everyone who recommends being kind and gentle with yourself! It has been a stressful winter for sure. You pulled Ramsey through though, along with Emma (remember the worry before she foaled?) Rest, eat well, enjoy your animal friends - (for me, starting seedlings, once I get organized, is very inspiring!)

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  5. I hear you. The weather has been really crappy, relentless wind is right - it's horrible and same thing every day with dark over cast skies and the wind is cold - it wears on you. It's been a long time since we had some nice weather and that absolutely gets you feel less motivated and just down. I've been feeling that too. I'm hoping soon the sun will come back out and the darned wind will go away- you'll feel better and more motivated once it does. So just be good to yourself and try and wait it out. That's what I keep telling myself too!

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  6. Since surviving a serious head injury a number of years ago, I don't get hung up on any of the things that sit there on the "Ought to...." list.

    I now know that when my time comes, I'll not be wishing I'd spent more time Hoovering or cleaning windows, I'll just be glad for the hours spent with the friends (2 & 4 legged) who love me.

    healing Ramsey has been a tough slog, so I'd recommend a nice sunny spot, a good book & some phone calls. Or just come on here to converse with people who care :)

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    1. Well, I know one thing for absolute certain...when my time comes, even if I live to be 500, I will never be accused of spending too much time hoovering or cleaning windows:) Thanks for your great comments. Having had my own brushes with mortality, I totally agree with you about how I should be spending some time. I agree, I just don't always get it right:)

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  7. Having survived a very serious head injury a number of years ago, I'm now pretty sure that when my time comes, I won't be regretting that I haven't spent more time doing the things on the "Ought to" list of hoovering, window cleaning etc. I'll just be glad for all the hours I've spent with the 2 and 4-legged friends who love me.

    Healing Ramsey has been a tough mental slog, so I heartily agree with your plan to pull up a chair & chill out with your equines.The chores can wait! Or you could just keep blogging to hear from people who care :)

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