A Little Misunderstanding

"Hey Ma,"

"Yes Emma?"

"When are you going to teach me to drive that thing?"

"Uh...what, you mean the lawn mower?!?"

"Yeah, you keep saying you're going to teach me to drive, so when do I get to drive?"

Oh boy.  "Emma, that just so isn't the kind of driving I've been talking about.  I want to teach you to pull a sled or a cart, that kind of driving."

"WHAT!!!  That is the most ridiculous idea I've ever heard.  What does me pulling a sled around have to do with driving?  I don't see any correlation what-so-ever? Lordy-be, that's even sillier than this mythical baby you keep talking about.  I think we should stick with my plan...So, which do I get to drive, the red or the green one?"

"Em, I'm sorry.  I can't teach you to drive either of them, they just aren't designed for donkeys.  You wouldn't be able to reach the pedals.  I really don't think you would enjoy it anyway, it's very boring, noisy, tedious...Besides, it would be redundant, you're already an excellent lawn mower."

"Hrmph, not designed for me...isn't that discrimination?  What about Universal Access?  You said I am going to be a driving donkey, but now you tell me I can't drive.  I swear, you humans are so hard to understand, you have the goofiest language.  How do any of you communicate with each other?


"We do have problems with that sometimes, but we work with what we have.  Do you have another suggestion?

"Of course, you all should learn how to speak Donkey.  Then there would be no more misunderstandings and all would be right with the world.   There, now that that is settled and I have found the path to world peace and since you aren't going to teach me to drive like you promised...I see some grass that needs my attention.  I better go deal with this the donkey way."   Me pull a sled...absurd...Mom sure does have some foolish notions...

   

Driving Lessons

Emma and I have started taking our first tentative steps towards driving.  Actually, This is an exercise that I do with all of my horses whether I go on to teach them to drive or not.  All that is needed is a halter, lead rope, a cheap plastic sled on a rope and an equine who knows how lead. 

Step 1.  Introduce said equine to the scary sled.  Make sure they can see it dragging on the ground all around them.  Once you can move it all around your horse or donkey (including under their feet) without fear, go to the next step.

Step 2.  Lead your equine with the sled trailing you.  Expect and be ready for a fear response at first.  Provide lots of positive reinforcement and go slow.  You'll want to start out with the sled rope in your outside hand, move it to the inside when your four-legged friend gives the OK.  Eventually, hold to sled rope on the animal's shoulder while you walk.  Depending on your equine partner, this can take as little as five minutes or as much as a week.  Just keep at it until your equine is completely bored with the process, then switch sides and repeat.  Then do it a few more times just to be sure.... 

Eventually, once your horse or donkey is completely bored with all aspects of dragging a sled around, attach the sled to a breast collar (either on a harness or a saddle breast collar).  At first, just tuck the rope under the collar with no knots so a gentle tug will release it.  If your animal EVER gets really frightened, just let go of the sled and stop.  Go back to the beginning and start again.  Don't ever let the sled "chase" your horse.  Once you get to the totally bored stage, you can move up to adding a single-tree, then adding weight.  From there, go on to pulling a tire around.  If you happen to actually own a harness and a cart, you can then start thinking about attaching the cart to your four-legged friend.

Even if (like me) you don't actually have a harness or a cart yet, this is an invaluable lesson to work through.  Especially for riding horses.  Just teaching your equine to cope with all the ropes, noise and the things dragging behind will make you and your horse safer.  And if you are struggling with the miseries of winter, this is an excellent way to work your way toward Spring.  At least that is what I keep trying to tell Emma.  Do you think she believes me?....